Latest Jokes
Favorite this joke I know a surgeon who puts organs back in upside down.
He says it’s an inside joke.
I accidentally put eye drops in my ear...
Now I can literally see what you’re saying!
Fred, a waiter who had worked in a small restaurant for 53 years, passed away one night. His wife, Lois was heartbroken without him; she spent several days contacting psychics, channelers, anyone who could help her contact Fred, but unfortunately met without success.
One day, Lois' nephew came for a visit. She explained the situation to him, upon which he suggested the possibility that Fred's ghost might be haunting the restaurant. Becoming hopeful again, Lois waited until the restaurant had closed for the night, went in the back door and sat at a table. "Fred?" she called into the darkness. "Fred darling, are you here?"
A small voice called back, "Yes, dear."
Lois happily exclaimed, "Oh Fred, I've missed you so much! But can you speak a bit louder, please? I'm afraid I'm having trouble hearing you."
Fred replied, "I'm sorry, I can't."
Lois said, "Then could you come a bit closer, please?"
"Oh, I'm afraid I can't," Fred replied. "That's not my table."
Heard a woman in Target ask her kid, "Is that a smart choice to make with your money?"
Now I'm wishing she would follow me around the store, too.
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