What did the former boxer-turned-barista ask his patrons?
"Ya want one lump or two???"
A lumberjack once told me he's cut down 27,653 trees.
“How do you know exactly how many?” I inquired.
“Easy. I keep a log.”
So I was in the chemist lab and I said to the assistant, “What gets rid of germs?”
She said, "Ammonia cleaner."
I said, "Oh sorry, I thought you worked here...”
First Student: "Great Scott! I've forgotten who wrote 'Ivanhoe'?"
Second Student: "I'll tell you if you tell me who the dickens wrote 'A Tale of Two Cities'?"