Frankie: "So, I took my girlfriend out for dinner at this fancy restaurant last night; she orders a bowl of soup, and wouldn't you know it, she finds a fly in her soup!"
Jeff: "Oh, that's awful! What did she do?"
Frankie: "Well, she turns to the waiter and calls, 'Waiter, remove this insect!"
Jeff: "And what happened then?"
Frankie: "He kicked me out the door."
A man goes into a restaurant and orders a cup of coffee. After the waiter brings it to him, the man pours the coffee into the vase on the table, and eats the cup and saucer, except for the handle, which he places on the table. He then orders another cup of coffee; after the waiter brings to to him, he pours out the coffee again, eats the cup and saucer and places the handle on the table again. He does this several times until there's a large pile of coffee cup handles on the table.
As the man finishes eating another coffee cup, he notices the waiter looking at him quizzically. "Why, you must think I'm crazy!" he says.
"Not at all, sir," the waiter replies. "I only wonder why you keep throwing the handle away; it's the best part."