If ever u feel overloaded by life, wife or work, Immediately go to the nearest "Biological Anxiety Relief" (BAR) center & place order for any 1 or more of the following Antidotes:
1. Wife Irritation Neutralizing Extract (WINE)
2. Refreshing Unique Medicine (RUM)
3. Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (BEER)
4. Vaccino Officio Depression Killing Antigen (VODKA)
5. Wife High Infusing Suspicion Killing Energy Yeast (WHISKEY)
I walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a Screwdriver.
He disappears and reappears twenty minutes later with a Philips Head screwdriver.
I look at him aghast and say, “What would you have done if I asked for a Bloody Mary?”
Do not keep roasted peanuts in transparent jar, they disappear fast.
But if you keep roasted cashews in transparent jar next to peanut jar, the peanuts last longer.
However, if you add third element... let's say a nearby liquor bottle... then all will disappear in no time!