A Florida officer pulled over an eighty-year-old school teacher because her hand signals were confusing. "First you put your hand up, like you're turning right, then you waved your hand up and down, then you turned left," said the officer.
"I decided not to turn right," she explained.
“Then why the up and down?" asked the officer.
"Officer," she sniffed, "I was erasing!"
After a completing his investigation the detective indicated that he thought it was foul play.
The other detective said, “You mean he was playing with birds?”
Police are on the lookout after a man has been breaking into farms and stealing cows.
They are looking for a male with a large moo-stash.
An off-duty police officer, familiar with radar guns, drove through a school zone within the legal speed limit when the flash of a camera went off, taking a picture of his license plate.
The officer, thinking the radar was in error, drove by again; even more slowly. Another flash. He did it again for a third time, at an even slower speed. Same result.
"This guy must have screwed up the settings," the off-duty officer thought.
A few weeks later, when he received the violations in the mail, he discovered three traffic tickets: each for not wearing a seat belt.