puns jokes

My house is haunted by a ghostwriter...

Last night, I came home and my autobiography had been written.

I applied for a job as a weatherman, but my knowledge of meteorology was a little cloudy.

There was once a wise man who loved a beautiful young maiden. She lived in a marsh where his car always got stuck. In addition, her father had a gun, so he never did get close enough to tell her of his passion.

However, she had a more energetic suitor who purchased amphibious tires for his car and, when her father was asleep, speedily carried her off.

Moral: Treads rush in where wise men fear to fool.