Category: Kid Jokes

An old county doctor went way out to the boondocks to deliver a baby. It was so far out that there was no electricity. When the doctor arrived, no one was home except for the laboring mother and her 5 year old child. The doctor instructed the child to hold a lantern high so he could see while he helped the woman deliver the baby. 
The child did so, the mother pushed, and after a little while, the doctor lifted the new born baby by the feet and spanked him on the bottom to get him to take his first breath. 
"Hit him again," the child said. "He shouldn't have crawled up there in the first place!!"

Glen, why do you always get so dirty? Asked the teacher.
Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are. He replied

Little Amy confided to her uncle, “When I grow up I’m going to marry the boy next door.”
“Why is that?”
“Cause I’m not allowed to cross the road.”

Willy runs in and tells his mother you’d better come out. I’ve just knocked over the ladder at the side of the house. His mother says, go and tell your father, I’m busy.
Willy says, Mom he already knows, he’s hanging from the roof.