Category: Doctors Jokes



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Ranking: 3.29 / 42
An Antartican was in the therapist office:
Dr. Hieden: Why are you here?
Antartican: I tried to commit suicide by taking 1,000 aspirins!!!!
Dr. hieden: What happened?
Antartican: Well after the first two I felt better!!!!
#4073    
Thanks to: Erica - USA.
rec.:Apr/13/2002    pub.:Jun/22/2002


Ranking: 2.92 / 66
Looking down at his patient, the doctor decided to tell him the truth. “I fell that I must tell you: You are a very sick man. I’m sure you would want to know the facts. I don’t think you have much time left. Now, is there anyone you would like to see?”
Bending down toward the sick man, the doctor heard him softly answer, “Yes.”
“Who is it?”
In a little stronger tone, the patient said, “Another doctor.”
#15401    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jun/24/2005    pub.:Jun/24/2005    sent:Aug/3/2005


Ranking: 2.91 / 66
A doctor taking care of his last appointment of the day gives this man a thorough exam and finds him in optimal health. As the man is going out the door, he had a heart attack and died. The doctor looks at the man and tells the nurse, “help me turn him around to it looks like he was just coming in.”
#17809    
Thanks to: K Meyer - NC - USA.
rec.:Mar/19/2007    pub.:Apr/5/2007    sent:Jul/7/2007


Ranking: 2.72 / 87
A guy thought he was dead, but in reality he was very much alive.
His hallucination became a real problem for his family and they finally took him to see a psychiatrist. After spending many laborious sessions trying to convince the guy he was still alive, the psychiatrist tried one last approach. He opened his medical book and proceeded to show the man that dead men don’t bleed. After a mind-numbing study, the man seemed convince that dead men don’t bleed, and the psychiatrist asked: “Do you now agree that dead men don’t bleed?” “Yes I do” the man replied. “Very well, then,” the psychiatrist said. He took out a pin and pricked the man’s finger. Out came a drop of blood. The doctor asked. “What does that tell you?” “Oh my goodness!” The patient exclaimed as he stared doubtfully at his finger…. “Dead men do bleed!!”
#18313    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Aug/28/2007    pub.:Aug/28/2007    sent:Oct/6/2007


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