Category: Doctors Jokes

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Ranking: 2.91 / 66
A doctor taking care of his last appointment of the day gives this man a thorough exam and finds him in optimal health. As the man is going out the door, he had a heart attack and died. The doctor looks at the man and tells the nurse, “help me turn him around to it looks like he was just coming in.”
Thanks to: K Meyer - NC - USA.
rec.:Mar/19/2007    pub.:Apr/5/2007    sent:Jul/7/2007

Ranking: 3.23 / 43
Old Granny Parkinson had won over half a million dollars in the lottery, but as she was a frail little woman her family was concerned that the shock of hearing the news might prove too much for her. Accordingly, they called in the family doctor to ask his advice.
“I’ll tell her if you like,” said the doctor. “I’ll lead up to it gradually.” The family accepted his offer gratefully, and showed him into the old lady’s bedroom. The doctor pretended to give her a routine examination and then began to chat generally of this and that, carefully leading the conversation ‘round to money. “Tell me Mrs. Parkinson,” he said, “what would you do if you suddenly came into half a million dollars?”
“Half a million?” said the old lady reflectively, “well you’ve always been very good to me, doctor, so I think I’d give half of it to you.”
And the doctor immediately collapsed and died of shock.
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jan/24/2003    pub.:Jan/24/2003

Ranking: 2.81 / 75
Doctor, Doctor I think I need glasses.
You certainly do, sir, this is a fish and chip shop!

Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jun/25/2009    pub.:Jun/25/2009    sent:Jul/28/2009

Ranking: 2.46 / 138
A Man rushed into a doctor's office, jumped on his back, and started screaming, "One! Two! Three! Four!" "Wait a minute!" yelled the doctor, trying to get free. “What do you think you're doing?" The man said, "Well doctor, they did say I could count on you!"
Thanks to: Ashley - USA.
rec.:Aug/18/2002    pub.:Nov/12/2002    sent:Nov/8/2007

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