Category: Doctors Jokes

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Ranking: 2.23 / 98
Patient: Oh, doctor, I have terrible troubles. I do hope that you can help me
Psychiatrist: Now calm down. Just lie down on the couch and tell me all about your troubles.
Patient: Well, doctor, I have a duplex penthouse apartment in New York and a summer house on the beach at the Hampton. I drive a Rolls-Royce, and my wife drives a Jaguar. My two boys go to the best private school in the city. We belong to three very swanky clubs, and every year I manage to spend a month in Europe.
Psychiatrist: These things are very wonderful, but let’s get down to your basic problem.
Patient: I was just getting to it, doctor. You see, I only make $100 a week!
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jun/22/2007    pub.:Jun/22/2007    sent:Nov/20/2007

Ranking: 2.39 / 71
A man visits his psychiatrist and talks about being haunted by visions of his departed relatives. He says; these ghosts are perched on the tops of fence posts around my garden every night. They sit there and watch me and watch me. What can I do?
The psychiatrist says; that's easy … just sharpen the tops of the posts.
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Feb/20/2006    pub.:Feb/20/2006    sent:Nov/2/2006

Ranking: 2.88 / 34
"The doctor said he would have me on my feet in two weeks."
"And did he?"
"Yes, I had to sell the car to pay the bill."
Thanks to: Paulina A. Candia - Santiago - R. M. - Chile
rec.:Jul/25/1998    pub.:Jul/25/1998    sent:Jul/25/1998

Ranking: 2.43 / 58
How does a doctor commit suicide? He jumps down from his ego to his IQ.
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jan/22/2008    pub.:Jan/22/2008    sent:Nov/3/2008

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