Category: Doctors Jokes

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Ranking: 3.40 / 90
Rose accompanied her husband Tom to his annual checkup. While Tom was getting dressed, the doctor came out and said to Rose, “I don’t like the way he looks.” “Neither do I,” she said. “But he’s handy around the house.”

#21150    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:May/14/2010    pub.:May/14/2010    sent:May/27/2010


Ranking: 3.37 / 93
A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him an exam and found nothing physically wrong with him. “Listen,” the doctor said, “if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you need to stop taking your troubles to bed with you.”
“It’s true,” said the patient, “but my wife refuses to sleep alone.”
#16804    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:May/10/2006    pub.:May/10/2006    sent:Jul/8/2015


Ranking: 3.12 / 131
A man goes to the doctors and asks why he's been feeling ill. The doctor examines him and replies "I'm sorry to tell you, you've got the disease known as Yellow 24." "What's that?” the man asks. "It means your internal organs have started turning yellow - you've got 24 hours to live".
The man goes home and tells his wife the bad news. His wife says "Well, will you come to bingo with me tonight then? Otherwise you'll never be able to." The man agrees so he and his wife go to the bingo. He finds that he's won the one-line and £10. He begins to think this isn't such a bad day after all. Twenty minutes later, he's won the full house and £150. He enters the lucky draw, worth £500, and wins that too. The bingo caller calls him up on stage.
He says "I don't believe it, mate. You've won three competitions in a total of £660 in one night. You must be the luckiest man on the earth!"
The man says "Well, no, I'm not. I've got Yellow 24."
The bingo caller looks down at the piece of paper he's holding and starts clapping. "I don't believe it; he's won the raffle as well!"
#19704    
Thanks to: Hannah and Em - Bedford - United Kingdom
rec.:Nov/30/2008    pub.:Dec/19/2008    sent:May/12/2015


Ranking: 3.08 / 140
Patient: "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?"
Doctor: "One hundred percent. Medical records show that nine out of ten
people die of the disease you have. "Yours is the tenth case I've treated;
the others all died."
#11613    
Thanks to: Dian C - Jakarta - DKI - Indonesia
rec.:Nov/4/2003    pub.:Dec/10/2003    sent:Mar/5/2015


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