Category: Work Jokes

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Ranking: 2.98 / 51
After being laid off from five different jobs in four months, Peter was hired by a warehouse. But one day he lost control of the forklift and drove it off the loading dock.
Surveying the damage, the owner shook his head and said he’d have to withhold 10 percent of Peter’s wages to pay for the repairs. “How much will it cost?” asked Peter
“About $4,500,” said the owner.
“What a relief!” exclaimed Peter. “I’ve finally got job security!”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jul/12/2002    pub.:Jul/12/2002

Ranking: 3.33 / 33
How is your new job at the factory?” One guy asked another.
“I’m not going back there.”
Why not?”
“For many reasons,” he answered. “The sloppiness, the shoddy workmanship, the awful language – they just couldn’t put up with it.
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jul/20/2002    pub.:Jul/20/2002

Ranking: 3.18 / 39
I hear the boys are gonna strike," one worker told another.
"What for?" asked the friend.
"Shorter hours."
"Good for them. I always did think 60 minutes was too long for an hour."
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jan/2/2002    pub.:Jan/2/2002

Ranking: 3.29 / 34
The economy is not going well and an unemployed engineer desperately needing work is nervous about an upcoming accountant job interview. The interview goes well, but as the engineer stands up to leave the manager says, "Oh just one more question. How much is four times eight?" Puzzled, the engineer responds that in all calculations, even simple ones like that, he never relies on his memory. He always uses a calculator with a paper printout, and double-checks his answer. "Fine", says the manager, but I just want you to tell me the answer anyway from memory without using your calculator. "Sure," says the engineer. "Four times eight is, uh, thirty-four." After saying goodbye and leaving the building, the engineer hurriedly pushes up four times eight into his calculator and curses when he sees the answer.

Nonetheless, he gets the job. Six months later, when he's doing well and feels confident enough, he walks up to his boss and asks him. "Sir, I'm curious. Why is it that out of all those engineering candidates, you hired me, when I gave you the wrong answer to four-times-eight?" His boss looks up and says, "Your answer was the closest."
Thanks to: Dan Wheatley - USA.
rec.:Apr/1/2002    pub.:Jun/22/2002

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