Category: Work Jokes

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Ranking: 3.09 / 32
Part II
WHAT THE NEW JOB-LINGO REALLY MEANS by Dede Molter


"CAREER-MINDED": Female applicants must be childless (and remain that way).
"NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE": We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.
"SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE": You'll need it to replace three people whom just left.
"PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST": You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.
"REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS": You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.
"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS": Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.
#339    
Thanks to: Dede Molter - USA.
rec.:May/24/1999    pub.:May/24/1999    sent:May/24/1999


Ranking: 2.61 / 61
After years in the work force, someone finally concluded that an employer is someone who’s late when you’re early and early when you’re late.
#10339    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jul/1/2003    pub.:Jul/1/2003    sent:Jul/15/2003


Ranking: 2.49 / 67
There is one Very Serious Law Firm.
All staff comes to work at 6am and leaves around 11pm.
Suddenly, one guy started his day at 9am.
All the guys exchanged “looks”.
And he left at 6pm.
All the guys exchanged “looks”.
Next day is the same story.
And the day after is the same story.
Finally, they come to this rebel to explain the rules.
He listened, kept quiet for a while and said: ”Excuse me guys, I am on vacation…”
#13217    
Thanks to: Anonymous
rec.:Apr/15/2004    pub.:Apr/26/2004    sent:Nov/17/2004


Ranking: 2.47 / 62
The man applied for a job with a chain food store. “What is your experience with groceries?” asked the interviewer. “Well,” said the applicant. “I’m eating them all the time.”
#20862    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Feb/2/2010    pub.:Feb/2/2010    sent:Dec/18/2010


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