Category: Holiday Jokes

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Ranking: 2.43 / 68

It's Christmas Eve and mom is busily preparing the last minute decorations in the family room when little Sally say: "Mom, don't forget to put out the treat for Santa next to the fireplace." Distracted, the mom thanks Sally and goes to the kitchen for Santa's treat. Later, when putting her to bed Sally says. "Mom, why did you put a can of Slim-fast next to Santa's treat?" Distracted and anxious to get back downstairs to finish the decorations mom replies. "Daddy is on a diet."
Thanks to: ed castellanos - pico rivera - ca - USA.
rec.:Nov/20/2009    pub.:Dec/2/2009    sent:Dec/24/2009

Ranking: 2.03 / 147
What kind of make up was the girl wearing on Halloween?
Thanks to: Stephanie - USA.
rec.:Oct/8/2003    pub.:Oct/17/2003    sent:Oct/19/2004

Ranking: 2.05 / 129
Dracula was on a night out with his buddies and after much intoxication decided to call it a night. On his walk home he took a few back streets to shortcut. Upon walking down one such dark alley he was hit in the back of the head by a sausage roll but after looking around could not see whom the culprit was. Once again, in the next dimly lit passage he felt a chicken wrap splat across his back, thrown from behind, but again the perpetrator had hidden.

Finally as Dracula got to his castle gates, he felt a tap on the shoulder... he turned round to a dark figure wielding a sausage on a cocktail stick. No sooner had Dracula spoken than the dark figure plunged the stick into his heart.

Falling to the floor, Dracula uttered his last words... "Who are you?"... To which the dark stranger announced....
"I am Buffet the Vampire Slayer"!
Thanks to: Lukus Clinkletoes - Reading - United Kingdom
rec.:Jul/26/2006    pub.:Oct/3/2006    sent:Oct/31/2009

Ranking: 1.98 / 94
Q. Why does Santa go down the chimney on Christmas rather than through the door?
A. Because it soot’s him!
Thanks to: galina - irvine - california - USA.
rec.:Jun/27/2004    pub.:Jul/21/2004    sent:Dec/24/2008

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