holiday jokes

Category: "Holiday Jokes"
$12.00 won 3 votes

The cost of Halloween Candy is up 13.1% since last year, and to make matters worse, they're giving us less in every package.

For example, Good 'n Plenty is now Not Bad 'N A Couple.

The $100,000 Bar is now the $27 Bite.

Then, of course, there's the new 2 Musketeers bar.

3 votes

CATEGORY Holiday Jokes
posted by "aod318" |
2 votes

A visitor to the North Pole was given the grand tour of the place by Santa Claus.

The visitor suddenly exclaimed, "What a huge reindeer! But why doesn't it have any antlers?"

Santa replied, "Well, there are several reasons that a reindeer might not have antlers. Some reindeer get their antlers late, some reindeer have their antlers broken off in a fight and some reindeer never grow any antlers at all."

The tourist moved closer for a better look and asked, "What happened to this one?"

Santa replied, from fifty yards away, "He was born a horse."

2 votes

CATEGORY Holiday Jokes
posted by "merk" |
0 votes

I told my wife that there is only one thing that scares me on Halloween.

My wife: Which is?

Me: Exactly!

0 votes

CATEGORY Holiday Jokes
posted by "Dan the Man 009" |
$10.00 won 2 votes

An extremely vain sorceress zoomed into the local dollar store on her broom, fuming from head-to-toe. “Which one of you morons is responsible for putting my name on your product without my permission? I’m going to turn you into a toad!”

A shuddering young clerk bravely came forward— “I’m extremely sorry ma'am; I honestly thought Witch Hazel was an approved product.”

“You idiot,” screamed the hag. “I’m talking about the Barbie doll!”

2 votes

CATEGORY Holiday Jokes
posted by "Wano U" |