You've finally have gone overboard with your ugly Christmas sweaters...
This one is so ugly, it makes Ralph Lauren just Ralph!
What is the most common sickness for Christmas Trees?
Why do gingerbread men not have teeth?
Because they are prone gingivitis.
A little girl is in the kitchen watching her mother prepare for the following day's Christmas dinner.
She asks, "Mommy, can I please have a cat for Christmas?"
Her mommy replies, "No honey, you'll have turkey just like the rest of us."