holiday jokes

What did the turkey say on Thanksgiving?
Don't "gobble" me up!

A descendant of Eric The Red, named Rudolf the Red, was arguing with his wife about the weather. His wife thought it was going to be a nice day, and he thought it was going to rain. Finally she asked him, how he was so sure. He smiled at her, and calmly said, "Because Rudolf the Red knows rain, dear."


(Rudolf the red-nosed raindeer?)

Q. Why does Santa go down the chimney on Christmas rather than through the door?

A. Because it soot’s him!

What kind of make up was the girl wearing on Halloween?
Mash-scara!