Category: Family Jokes

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Ranking: 2.77 / 61
A very intelligent boy was fortunate enough to be receiving a far better education than his parents had enjoyed, and his vocabulary far outstripped theirs. One day he came home from school and said “Mommy, may I relate to you a narrative?”
“What’s a narrative, Gerald?” she asked.
“A narrative, Mommy, is a tale.”
“Oh, I see,” said his mother nodding, and Gerald told her his story. At bedtime as he was about to go upstairs he said, “Shall I extinguish the light Mommy?”
“What’s extinguish?” she asked.
“Extinguish means to put out, Mommy,” said brainy Gerald
“Oh, I see. Yes, certainly.”
The next day the clergyman came to tea and the family dog began to make a nuisance of himself, as a dog will, by begging for goodies from the table. “Gerald,” said his mother, trying to impress, “take that dog by the narrative and extinguish him!”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jan/22/2003    pub.:Jan/22/2003

Ranking: 2.63 / 72
Q. Why did the student eat his homework?

A. His teacher said it was a piece of cake.
Thanks to: Joanne - San Juan - PR - USA.
rec.:Nov/5/2001    pub.:Dec/4/2001

Ranking: 2.73 / 60
When he was finished with the bulk of the changes, Mr. Smith added yet one more stipulation to his will: that he be buried at sea.
He explained, “that’s just in case my wife makes good on her threat t dance on my grave.”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Sep/17/2003    pub.:Sep/17/2003    sent:Oct/16/2003

Ranking: 2.40 / 106
A man whose son had just passed his driving test went home one evening and found that the boy had driven slap into the living room.
“How on earth did you manage to do that?” he fumed.
“Quite simple, Dad. I came in through the kitchen and turned left!”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jan/27/2004    pub.:Jan/27/2004    sent:Jan/23/2008

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