family jokes

Category: "Family Jokes"
$15.00 won 5 votes

After a rough day spent corralling my rowdy kids, I’d had enough.

“I think I’m going to sell them,” I hissed to my sister.

“You’re crazy,” she said.

“For thinking of selling them?”

“For thinking someone would buy them.”

5 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
Joke Won 3rd Place won $15.00
posted by "srg" |
0 votes

George, who had a wife and 8 children, needed to move because his rental agreement was terminated by the owner who wanted to reoccupy the home. But he was having a lot of difficulty finding a new house. When he said he had 8 children, no one would rent a home to him because they felt that the children would destroy the place. He couldn't say he had no children, because he didn't believe in lying.

So, he sent his wife for a walk to the cemetery with 7 of their kids. He took the remaining one with him to see rental homes with the real estate agent. He loved one of the homes and the price was right. The agent asked, "How many children do you have?"

He answered, "Eight."

The agent asked, "Where are the others?"

George, looked the agent right in the eye, and answered, "They're at the cemetery with their mother."

0 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "wadejagz" |
$50.00 won 3 votes

People’s parents actually give them sage advice, like “Do what you love, and the money will follow” or “The early bird gets the worm.”

All I remember is, “Don’t fill up on bread.”

3 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
Joke Won 1st Place won $50.00
posted by "sravanthi" |
$12.00 won 5 votes

I can’t tell the difference between a rose and a dandelion.

So when it came time to fix up my garden, I had no clue which plants to keep and which ones to remove.

Until, that is, my mother gave me this handy tip: “Pull them all up. If it comes back, it’s a weed.”

5 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "sravanthi" |