family jokes

Category: "Family Jokes"
5 votes

Little Jenny: Hi Mommy, where is Daddy?

Mother: He's lying on the couch and has been watching baseball all day. Why do you ask?

Little Jenny: I wanted to tell him what we learned in school today.

Mother: Oh yeah sweetie, and what was that?

Little Jenny: Well, the teacher taught us that the human body has 270 bones at birth and 206 by adulthood.

Mother: Wow Jenny! I did not know that, but I'm afraid that your teacher is incorrect when it comes to your Father though.

Little Jenny: Really Mommy, why is that?

Mother: Because he has an extra one, for a total of 207. It's named the Lazy-bone.

5 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "Michael Stephen Douglas" |
$10.00 won 9 votes
rating rating rating rating rating

Grandfather: Son, you've got your shoes on the wrong feet.

Grandson: But these are the only feet I have?

Grandfather: Fair enough.

9 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
Joke Won 5th Place won $10.00
posted by "Clown" |
$25.00 won 7 votes

After completing dinner, a husband carries his plate to the sink and starts washing it.

His wife looks at him in disbelief and says, "Honey, we are not at home. This is a restaurant."

7 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
Joke Won 2nd Place won $25.00
posted by "Shenghen" |
2 votes

My son crawled for the first time while I was away on business. I also missed his first steps. I was now afraid I would miss his first words. Each day, I called home and asked if he had spoken yet.

The answer was always "no" until one day my wife said, "Harry has something to say to you.... 'Daddy, daddy,'"

I heard it over the phone and I glowed with pride. My wife came back on the line and said, "You should come home as soon as possible."

"Why?" I asked.

"He was speaking to the dog."

2 votes

CATEGORY Family Jokes
posted by "Harry Finkelstein" |