family jokes
Favorite this joke DAUGHTER: I have to use the bathroom.
ME: *pulls into rest stop*
DAUGHTER: Thanks.
ME: Make sure you’re back in 5 minutes.
DAUGHTER: I will.
ME: We accidentally left your brother behind once.
DAUGHTER: I don’t have a brother.
ME: Exactly.
A woman walks into a fabric shop and says, "May I have three yards of Satan, please? I'm making a dress for my sister."
"I believe you mean satin, ma'am," the shopkeeper replies. "Satan is something that looks like the devil."
"Oh, then you've seen my sister!"
Having raised a large family, my mother cooked everything in battalion-size batches.
So when my newly married brother, Ron requested her chop-suey recipe, she experimented for two weeks with the ingredients in order to cut the dish down for the honeymooners.
"Thanks for the recipe, Mom," "Ron wrote home. "The first thing we did was triple it so we would have plenty of leftovers!"
I was talking with my mother-in-law about our daughter's picky eating habits.
"She refuses to eat fish," I told her. "Any recommendations for a replacement?"
She thought a moment, then answered, "Cats. They love fish."
Free Daily Joke