family jokes
Favorite this joke Father buys a lie detector that makes a loud beep whenever somebody tells a lie. The son comes home in the afternoon.
Father asks him, “So, you were at school today, right?”
Son: “Yeah.”
Detector: “Beep.“
Son: “OK, OK, I was at the movies.”
Detector: “Beep.”
Son: “Alright, I went for a beer with my friends.”
Father: “What?! At your age, I wouldn’t touch alcohol!“
Detector: “Beep.”
Mother laughs: “Ha! He really is your son!”
Detector: “Beep.”
When my three-year-old son opened the birthday gift from his grandmother, he discovered a water pistol. He squealed with delight and headed for the nearest sink.
I was not so pleased. I turned to Mom and said, "I'm surprised at you. Don't you remember how we used to drive you crazy with water guns?"
Mom smiled and then replied, "Oh I remember!"
Son: “Hey Dad, how does a sundial work?”
Dad: (hands son a phone) “Okay, now just call someone.”
Son: “Why can’t you do it?”
Dad: “Because that would be a DADdial.”
Teddy came thundering down the stairs, much to his father's annoyance.
"Teddy," he called, "how many more times do I have I to tell you to come downstairs quietly? Now, go back upstairs and come down like a civilized human being."
There was a silence, and Teddy reappeared in the front room.
"That's better," said his father. "Now in the future you will always come downstairs like that."
"OK," said Teddy cheerily. "I slid down the railing!"
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