family jokes
Favorite this joke Early one evening a gentleman scuttled out to his garage and pulled the lawn furniture out onto the driveway. Shortly after followed the lawnmower, a few gardening tools and a bicycle.
A curious neighbor wandered over and asked if he was going to have a garage sale.
"No," replied the gentleman, "my son just bought his first car and right now he's getting ready for a big date. He'll be taking the car out soon to pick up the girl."
"So what's with all the stuff?" asked the neighbor.
"Well, after years of moving tricycles, toys and sports equipment out of the way every time I came home from work, I wanted to make sure the driveway was ready for him."
Father: What you want to be in your life?
Son: A Doctor.
Father: What skills do you have of a doctor?
Son: Doctor's handwriting.
Like all growing boys, my teenage grandson was constantly hungry. I went to the refrigerator to find something he might like.
After poking around a bit and moving the milk and juice cartons, I spotted a bowl of leftover chili. I called out to him excitedly. He came running into the kitchen.
"Look! I found some chili!" I said to him.
Struggling to be polite, he said, "If you're that surprised, I'm not really sure I want it."
Little Johnny's new baby brother was screaming up a storm. Johnny asked his mom, “Where’d he come from?”
"He came from heaven, Johnny.”
“Wow! I can see why they threw him out!”
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