family jokes

We don't hide crazy in this family.

We put it out on the front porch and give it a beer!

Son: “Dad, did you get the results of the DNA test back?”

Dad: “Call me George.”

While the family was sitting around the dinner table, Jennifer, 5, turned to her brother Andy, 3, and pointed to her dad. "That's not your real father," she said, startling the whole family.

"Yes, he is!" Andy replied.

"No, he's not," Jennifer insisted. "God is your heavenly father."

Then pointing at her dad, she said, "That's your homely father!"

It was our great aunt's birthday, so we decided to call her up and sing "Happy Birthday."

Only trouble was we dialed the wrong number.

"Don't let it bother you," said the voice on the other end, "you need all the practice you can get."