family jokes

"Dad, who built the Suez Canal?"

"I don't know, son."

"Dad, who discovered penicillin?"

"I've no idea, son."

"Dad, what's the capital of Italy?"

"I ain't got a clue, son."

"Dad, you don't mind me asking all these questions do you?"

"Of course not, son. If you don't ask, you won't learn anything."

The difference between complete and finished?
If you marry the right one, that's complete.
If you marry the wrong one, that's finished.
If you marry the right one and then get caught with the wrong one, that's completely finished.

From Readers Digest

A frustrated father told a work colleague: “When I was a youngster, I was disciplined by being sent to my room without supper. But in my son’s room, he has his own color TV, computer, games console, cell phone and CD player.” “So what do you do?” The father replied: “I send him to my room!”

A little boy was about to eat a plate full of his delicious meal.

When his mom noticed his urge to eat the food, she quickly asked him,
"Have you said your prayer before eating that meal?"

The boy replied, "No, I won't because I don't want to give away 10% of my dinner."