Category: Family Jokes



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Ranking: 2.32 / 113
In the name of the Lord God: One day a sergeant came back home and said to his wife: Everything has changed in the army. From now on, he added, we are free to follow the orders of our officers and we can discuss the matters with them. His wife answered: That is in the army. Here at home none of that. Get up and wash the dishes!
#3532    
Thanks to: Morteza Olangui - Mehrshahr - Tehran - Iran
rec.:Mar/3/2002    pub.:Mar/10/2002


Ranking: 2.51 / 77
A small boy came running downstairs, shouting, “Mom! Mom! I cleaned my room without being told!”
“Well,” said the mother, “that's wonderful! Thank you very much. It will same me a lot of trouble, and it shows you are growing up.”
“Yeah, but, Mom,” said the boy, “don’t jump to conclusions.”
I don’t understand, dear,” said his mother. “Conclusions?”
“Yeah, Mom” said the boy. “This isn’t going to become a habit.”
#4061    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Apr/12/2002    pub.:Apr/12/2002


Ranking: 2.72 / 54
A woman, on meeting a psychologist at a party, made a pitch for some free professional advice. "What kind of toy would you suggest giving a little boy on his third birthday?" she asked.

"First I'd have to know more about the child," the psychologist hedged.

The woman took a deep breath. "He's very bright and quick-witted and exceptionally advanced for his age," she said. "He has good coordination, expresses himself very well..."

"Oh, I see," the psychologist said, "It's YOUR child!"
#13129    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Mar/29/2004    pub.:Mar/29/2004    sent:Jul/19/2004


Ranking: 3.13 / 31
Two kids talking: “Have you noticed, if you pass your exams everyone says you get your brains from your parents, but if you fail your exams everyone says you’re stupid.”
#6604    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Nov/13/2002    pub.:Nov/13/2002


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