Category: Family Jokes

Did you hear about this group of professional nannies that have formed a business, similar to the TV show called "The Nanny," where they go into people's homes and help parents with out-of-control children?

The name of their new business: The "SWAT" Team

The pastor preached about the beautiful kingdom of heaven and asked the congregation “how many of you would like to go to heaven from here?” everybody raised up their hands except a little lad sitting just in front of him “don't you want to go to heaven son?” he asked. “My mother seriously warned me not to go anywhere from here, but to come back home” replied the boy.

Two buddies were having a chat. Said one, "You know, I can trace my ancestors up the Family Tree." The other responded," That's so? Well, far as l know, there are only two things that live on trees: Them's birds and monkeys, and I see that you ain't got no feathers."

One evening as she was preparing dinner her 8-year-old son came down to the kitchen and he was crying hysterically. The loving mother bent down and said, "Honey what's wrong?" He said, "Mom, I just cleaned my room!" And she said, "Well, I'm very proud of you" "Why on earth would that make you cry?"
The eight year old looked up through his tears and said, "Because I still can't find my pet snake!"