Ranking: 2.77 / 48
“I used to be in show business. I had a very spectacular act.”
“What did you do?”
“I used to dive into a wet sponge from a height of fifty feet.
But then I broke my neck.”
“Did you miss the sponge?”
“No. Some idiot squeezed it dry”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
Ranking: 2.65 / 57
Pat and Mick have just started their job installing telegraph poles. At the end of the first week they both go to collect their wages and the boss tells Mick he is dismissed. Why? asks Mick. Well, said the boss. Pat has put in 50 poles this week and you have only done 5, Mick looks rather perplex, and says, “but look how far he has left them sticking out.”
Thanks to: chotchy - newcastle - england - United Kingdom
rec.:Jul/16/2007 pub.:Oct/3/2007 sent:Sep/9/2009
Ranking: 2.12 / 153
Ladies and Gentleman I stand in front of you, to stand in back of you, to tell you something I know nothing about. Last Night in the middle of the afternoon, just before Breakfast, an Empty Garbage truck, loaded with good furniture, almost ran over a dad alley cat. We hurried to the Hospital as slow as we could, and there sat King Auther sitting in a six corner round able eating Beer with a fork. If you don't believe me ask the Blind man he saw it all................
Thanks to: Bruce - INGRAM - tx - USA.
rec.:Sep/15/2003 pub.:Sep/18/2003 sent:Nov/15/2003
Ranking: 2.46 / 74
Mr. Smith and his son Rick were called to Mrs. Liventhal's classroom.
"Mr. Smith," said the teacher, "I asked Rick 'Who shot Abraham Lincoln?' and he said that he didn't do it!"
"Well, teacher," said Smith, "if my kid said he didn't do it -- he didn't do it!"
Father and son left the school, and on their way home, Smith turned to the boy and asked, "Tell me, son, did you do it?"
Thanks to: Yolanda Ortiz.
rec.:Dec/26/1998 pub.:Dec/26/1998 sent:Dec/26/1998