misc jokes

In search of a new shower for our home, my wife and I went to a bathroom-supply store.

We discussed our needs with a young saleswoman. Since it was near closing time, we had to curtail our discussion and made plans to come back the next day to make our final decision.

Later that evening, my wife and I were at a restaurant, where the same young lady from the bathroom-supply store was now working a shift as a waitress.

As she passed our table, she suddenly recognized us and called to me in a loud voice, "HEY! You're the man who needs a shower!"

Let's all pray that Jamaica isn't the first country to get plagued by the zombie epidemic.

Cause the last thing we need is zombies that can run at 100mph.

Two rectangles were having a heated debate when they arrive at an utter stalemate. Along comes a circle, so they ask her to decide which one of them are right.

The circle listens intently and replies with silence.

The two rectangles demand of the circle, "Who's side are you on?"

The circle replies, "I'm sorry, but I don't have a side."

I was in a job interview the other day and they asked if I could perform under pressure.

I said, "No, but I can perform Bohemian Rhapsody!"