misc jokes

Two farmers were bragging about how effective each other's scarecrows were.

"My scarecrow is so scary," the first farmer said. "That it frightened every single crow off of my farm."

"I can top you on that," replied the second farmer. "My scarecrow scared the crows so much that they brought back all of the corn they stole last year."

I'm no cactus expert...

But I know a prick when I see one.

I remember the time when I was reminiscing my love life while cutting up an onion...

The onion cried.

Why don’t pirates take a shower before they walk the plank?

They just wash up on shore.