misc jokes

Category: "Misc Jokes"
$7.00 won 2 votes

How do vampires start their letters?

"Tomb it may concern..."

2 votes

Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "Adie Peter" |
$12.00 won 8 votes

I wanted to donate blood today but they ask too many personal questions...

Like, "Whose blood is it?" and "Where did you get it?"....

8 votes

Joke Won 4th Place won $12.00
posted by "barber7796" |
2 votes

A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease. It's just that you look so much like my late son."

He answered, "That's okay."

"I know it's silly, but if you'd call out 'Good bye, Mom' as I leave the store, it would make me feel so happy."

She then went through the checkout, and as she was on her way out of the store, the man called out, "Goodbye, Mom."

The little old lady waved and smiled back at him. Pleased that he had brought a little sunshine into someone's day, he went to pay for his groceries.

"That comes to $121.85," said the clerk.

"How come so much? I only bought 5 items!"

The clerk replied, "Yeah, but your Mother said you'd be paying for her things, too."

2 votes

posted by "Dansei59" |
2 votes

The couple entered the resort's swanky dining room. "I'm sorry," apologized the Maitre D, "but there are no tables available."

"One moment, my friend," said the man, drawing himself up. "I happen to be Gregory R. Caruthers, the sportsman."

"I'd like to accommodate you, Mr. Caruthers, but there just isn't a table available this evening."

"I bet if the President came in and asked for a table, there'd be one available."

"Yes-s-s," the other admitted, "I suppose there would be a table available for the President."

"Good! I'll take it. He isn't coming!"

2 votes

posted by "wadejagz" |