misc jokes

Car Dealer: "This car had just one careful owner."

Buyer: "But look at it, it's a wreck!"

Car dealer: "Well yes, you see, the other seven owners weren't quite as careful."

Mindy: "I finally fixed that annoying noise in my car."

Missy: "Really? How did you do it?'

Mindy: "I opened the door and pushed him out."

“Sarcasm doesn’t get you anywhere.”

“Well it got me to the sarcasm world championships in Mexico ‘98.”

“Really?”

“No.”

Comedian: "I highly object to you having me go on stage after that monkey act."

Stage manager: "Honestly, I can understand, the audience might have thought it was an encore."