Category: Animal Jokes



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Ranking: 3.24 / 46
A famous art collector is walking through the city when he notices a mangy cat lapping milk from a saucer in the doorway of a store and he does a double-take. He recognizes that the saucer is extremely old and very valuable, so he walks casually into the store and offers to buy the cat for two dollars.
The storeowner replies, "I'm sorry, but the cat isn't for sale.
The collector says, "Please, I need a hungry cat around the house to catch mice. I'll pay you twenty dollars for that cat."
And the owner says "Sold," and hands over the cat.
The collector continues, "Hey, for the twenty bucks I wonder if you could throw in that old saucer. The cat's used to it and it'll save me from having to get a dish."
And the owner says, "Sorry buddy, but that's my lucky saucer. So far this week I've sold sixty-eight cats."
#975    
Thanks to: Ophelia Morning
rec.:Mar/21/2001    pub.:Mar/21/2001    sent:Mar/21/2001


Ranking: 2.61 / 112
A young polar bear asks his father, "Dad, am I 100% Polar Bear"
The father bear responds, "Well, son, I am all polar bear, your mother is all polar bear, your grandparents, even your great grandparents are 100% polar bear. So yes, son, you are 100% polar bear. Why do you ask?"
The young polar bear replies "Because I am really cold!"
#18385    
Thanks to: Dan - Houghton - MI - USA.
rec.:Sep/23/2007    pub.:Oct/26/2007    sent:Feb/3/2008


Ranking: 2.82 / 78
A man has a racehorse, never won a race. Man in disgust says,” Horse, you win today or you pull a milk wagon tomorrow morning." The starting gate opens, the horses take-off, they move the gate away and there lays his horse asleep on the track. He kicks the horse and asks, "WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING. The horse, half asleep says, "I have to get up at three in the morning."
#3176    
Thanks to: Albert Reed - Dillsburg - PA - USA.
rec.:Feb/6/2002    pub.:Feb/24/2002


Ranking: 3.20 / 45
“Look at that speed!” said one hawk to another as the jet fighter plane hurtled over their heads.
“Hmph!” snorted the other. “You would fly fast too if your tail was on fire!”
#7513    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Jan/22/2003    pub.:Jan/22/2003


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