Category: Animal Jokes

Jack was single. He lived in a small flat, which he shared with a pet parrot and a pit bull terrier named spike. When Jack's dishwashing machine broke down, he asked his neighbor Pet, the repairman to come and fix it. “The terrier won't harm you,” said Jack before leaving, "But whatever you do, NEVER SPEAK TO THE PARROT"

Soon after, the parrot started on Pet: "I heard your wife shout at you the other day, you are such a wimp" Pet ignored it and kept working. "You couldn't change your flat tire the other day" said the parrot, “so how are you going to fix a dishwashing machine?"
Fed up, Pet replied, "Okay. How would I expect you, with the brain the size of a bean to talk any sense?"
That’s it! Said the parrot, Spike, Get him!

Did you hear about the baby mouse that saw a bat?
He ran home and told his mother he’d seen and angel…

Bargains at the pet shop:
A hummingbird that knows the words
A bloodhound with hypoglycemia
A chameleon that's stuck on green
A depressed hyena
An absent-minded elephant

Q. Why does a cow wear a bell?
A. Because his horn doesn’t work!