Category: Animal Jokes

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Ranking: 2.22 / 81
Three ducks, in line, are crossing the road. “The duck in the back says, “Quack, quack!”
The duck in the front says, “Hey, I’m moving as fast as I can!”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Dec/11/2003    pub.:Dec/11/2003    sent:Jul/16/2004

Ranking: 2.30 / 69
Why did the turtle cross the road? “To get to the shell station.”

Why was the turtle so shiny when he left the shell station?
He used some turtle wax!
Thanks to: Thomas Mercer - Georgia - USA.
rec.:Feb/18/2004    pub.:Feb/19/2004    sent:Mar/20/2004

Ranking: 2.72 / 36
A male crab and a female lobster are dating, but they are hiding it from their parents because of the obvious reason. Eventually the lobster gets tired of all the secrecy and she tells her father, who is furious and forbids her to see the crab again.

“But why can’t I see the crab again? We’re in love!” cries the lobster.
“Because,” says the father, trying to search for a reasonable answer, “crabs walk sideways and we walk straight!”
“Please, father,” she begs. “Just meet him once and I’m sure you will change your mind.”
The father finally agrees to meet the crab and she runs our to tell him the good news.
The crab is so excited that he practices walking straight. He practices and practices until finally he can walk straight. He walks the entire way to the lobster’s house as straight as he can.
The father sees him coming and yells to his daughter, “Hey, here comes that crab and he’s drunk!”
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Feb/10/2004    pub.:Feb/10/2004    sent:Apr/30/2004

Ranking: 1.88 / 177
1.) What kind of animal hates to do it's laundry the most?
A Leopard because he has so many spots.
Thanks to: Tina Parsons - USA.
rec.:Jul/8/1997    pub.:Jul/8/1997    sent:Aug/12/2001

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