marriage jokes

A couple were on their first cruise. As they approached one of their destinations to take a tour, the husband remarked, “This might be some kind of “swinger” cruise, because our newsletter says we'll be using Tinder.”

“No, you idiot,” the wife said. “We're using TENDER boats to go into the harbor!”

My wife asked me, “What is the name of the cologne you are wearing?”

I replied, “GUESS.”

Her response was, “It would be much easier if you just told me.”

How can you tell if your wife is being unfaithful?

You move from Chicago to Seattle and you still have the same mailman.

A man is waiting in line for a hit movie. Behind him are two women. The usher comes along and says that he has two seats together.

Seeing the problem, the usher says to the man. "Let them go first. You wouldn't want to separate a woman from her mother, would you?"

The man says, "No, sir. I did that once, and I've been sorry ever since."