Category: Miscellaneous Jokes



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Ranking: 3.20 / 120
Having shot a moose two Antartians began dragging it by the tail to their pick-up.
On the way they were stopped by a game warden. "Let me see your hunting licenses boys," he said. When he saw that everything was in order he asked if he could give them some advice.
"Sure!" the hunters agreed.
"Well boys, I think that you would find it a lot easier to drag that moose by the horns and not the tail."
"Aye, O.K. and thanks," said the lads.
After about five minutes one said to the other, "Boy, dragging by the horns is sure a lot easier, eh?"
"Aye, you're right," said his friend, "but have you noticed that we are getting further away from the truck?"
#6411    
Thanks to: Tom Reilly - Cambridge - Ont. - Canada
rec.:Oct/30/2002    pub.:Feb/7/2003    sent:Dec/21/2013


Ranking: 2.98 / 169
Q: What do you call a midget fortuneteller on the run from the law?
A: A small medium at large.
#17242    
Thanks to: nomad - murrieta - ca. - Sudan
rec.:Sep/23/2006    pub.:Oct/16/2006    sent:Nov/3/2013


Ranking: 3.19 / 119
Bubba and Billy were driving down the road while drinking beer when they spotted a roadblock ahead. "We're gonna get busted," whimpered Billy. "Don't worry," said Bubba. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers, then peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads and then toss the bottles under the seat. Just let me do the talking." They downed the beer, threw the empties out of sight and put the labels on their foreheads. When they reached the roadblock, the police officer asked, "You boys been drinking?" "No, sir," said Bubba, pointing at the labels. "Me and Billy are on the patch."
#17747    
Thanks to: Dennis Varner - Spartanburg - South Carolina - USA.
rec.:Feb/25/2007    pub.:Mar/21/2007    sent:May/16/2012


Ranking: 3.10 / 134
The driving instructor was giving lessons to an extremely nervous student who panicked whenever another car approached on a particular two-lane road. One day, however, they got to the same stretch of road; and the student remained completely calm.
“This time you’re doing fine!” exclaimed the instructor. “Yes,” the novice driver agreed.
“Now when I see another car coming, I shut my eyes.”
#16828    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:May/15/2006    pub.:May/15/2006    sent:Feb/24/2013


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