Category: Bar & Drinking Jokes



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Ranking: 2.93 / 156
Phil had just joined a club after his friend had recommended it (being a member for quite some time). They were sitting at the bar having their beers when someone yelled "21" and there was a small uproar of laughter. A few minutes later someone else yelled "34" and another roar of laughter rose up. Phil, confused about this asked his friend "Why is everyone laughing at the numbers being called out" His friend said, well we've been telling the same jokes for so many years that we just numbered them all and if you want to tell a joke you just call out a number" Phil nodded and said "Can I try?" His friend nodded and Phil called out "121" and everyone in the club roared with laughter and it didn't die down for at least another 15 minutes after. "Why did everyone laugh so hard at that joke?" Phil asked. His friend said with a small chuckle "We haven't heard that one before." 
#1103    
Thanks to: Poetic 1 - Even bigger hole - New Zealand
rec.:Jul/30/2001    pub.:Jul/30/2001    sent:Jul/30/2001


Ranking: 2.86 / 171
A drunken man walked up to a parking meter and puts in some change. The meter goes up to sixty and he says, "Hey, I lost 100 pounds!"
#10002    
Thanks to: Jodi - USA.
rec.:Jun/5/2003    pub.:Jul/10/2003    sent:Feb/13/2013


Ranking: 3.16 / 99
An obnoxious drunk stumbles into the front door of a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says, "No way buddy you're too drunk."
A few minutes later the drunk comes in through the bathrooms, again he slurs, "give me a drink", bartender says "No man I told you last time you're too drunk"
Five minutes later the guy comes in through the back door and orders a drink, again the bartender says, "You're too drunk"
The drunk scratches his head and says "Damn I must be... the last two places said the same thing."
#733    
Thanks to: Samantha
rec.:Aug/3/2000    pub.:Aug/3/2000    sent:Feb/2/2013


Ranking: 3.57 / 53
A guy was meeting a friend in a bar, and as he walked in he noticed two pretty girls looking at him. He heard one girl say to the other; “Nine.” Feeling pleased with himself, he swaggered over to his buddy at the bar and told him that the girl in the corner had just rated him a nine out of ten. “Sorry to spoil your evening,” said his friend, “but when I walked in they were speaking German”
#23680    
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Sep/27/2013    pub.:Sep/27/2013    sent:Feb/12/2014


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