Category: Bar & Drinking Jokes

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Ranking: 3.10 / 59
A duck went into a bar and asked for some crackers. The waiter said no. The next day he came into the bar and asked for crackers again. The waiter said no, again. The next day he came in again and asked for crackers. The waiter said no. The next day the waiter said if you ask for crakers one more time I will nail your beak to the counter. The next day the duck asked if the waiter had any nails, "No," said the waiter. The duck then asked "Do you have any crackers"
Thanks to: Nixterdawn - North Edwards - CA - USA.
rec.:Jun/3/2000    pub.:Jun/3/2000    sent:Jun/3/2000

Ranking: 2.53 / 144
A woman was sleeping in her bed when her husband crashing through the front door at 3 am waked her up. He staggered and tried to get up the stairs, " what are you doing" she shouted, the husband replies " Im trying to get a gallon of beer up the stairs" "leave it down there" she bellowed "I cant" he replied " Ive drunk it".
Thanks to: chappy - londonderry - ulster - Ireland
rec.:Sep/17/2003    pub.:Sep/18/2003    sent:Oct/3/2008

Ranking: 2.70 / 104
A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender laughs and says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper looks at the bartender, with a look of extreme confusion on his face, and says, "You have a drink called Steve?"
Thanks to: Sami - Augusta - Georgia - USA.
rec.:Jun/9/2002    pub.:Aug/24/2002

Ranking: 2.60 / 120
In a greasy spoon, a downhearted diner asked the waitress for meatloaf and some kind words. She brought the meatloaf but didnt say a thing. Hey, he said, what about my kind word?
She replied, Dont eat the meatloaf.
Thanks to: Anonymous - USA.
rec.:Nov/24/2002    pub.:Nov/24/2002    sent:Oct/8/2008

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