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The neighborhood I lived in had a storm rapidly pass through.

When I returned home from work I noticed our outbuilding was gone.

Asking my wife about it, her reply was simple, "Gone with the Wind!"

As Noah was building the ark, what type of lights did he use?

FLOOD LIGHTS!

An atom loses an electron…

It says, “Man, I really gotta keep an ion them!”

The mother of three notoriously unruly youngsters was asked whether or not she'd have children if she had it to do over again.

"Sure," she replied, "but not the same ones."