Why did the butcher work extra hours at the shop?

To make ends meat.

Q: What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?

A: "Put it on my bill."

After surgery, the doctor said to the patient, "I am sorry, but I forgot a pair of scissors inside you. I need to..."

The patient quickly responded, "Oh don't bother doctor! If it is because of that, just tell me how much it cost and I will pay you back."

Two friends went for an interview for the same job. One was educated and the other wasn't, so they agreed to help each other.They agreed that the educated one would go first and when he was done, he would give the other the answers to all the questions. The first guy's interview started:

QN 1: "When was Tanzania's independence?"
GUY 1: "It was supposed to be 1960 but it was postponed to 1961 due to many reasons."

QN 2: "Who brought independence to Tanzania?"
GUY 1: "So many participated but it was Mwalimu Nyerere who finalized it."

QN 3: "It's believed that in planet Mars, there is life... is it true?"
GUY 1: "So many people say so, but it has not been scientifically proven."

When he left the interview room, he went straight to his uneducated friend and gave him all the answers. Second guy's interview also started:

QN 1: "When were you born?"
GUY 2: "It was supposed to be 1960 but it was postponed to 1961."

QN 2: "What!! Who is your father?"
GUY 2: "So many participated but it was Mr. Nyere who finalized it."

QN 3: "Oh My! Are u CRAZY???"
GUY 2: "So many say so but it has not been scientifically proven!"