"Did you tell her that what you said was in strict confidence?"
"No, I didn't want her to think it was important enough to repeat."
Eve: "My dear Jack is so forgetful."
Celia: "I agree. At the party last night I had to keep reminding him that it's you that he's engaged to and not me."
Over a drink on evening the discussion turned to length of hair...
Mr. Jones: "Don't you think long hair on a man makes him look intellectual?"
Mr. Smith: "That depends. My wife found a long hair on my coat sleeve yesterday."
A Yankee tourist in London went aboard the old battleship "Victory", which was Lord Nelson's flagship in several of his famous navel triumphs.
An English sailor escorted the Yank over the vessel, and coming to a raised brass tablet on the deck, he said, as he reverently removed his hat, "This, sir, is the spot where Lord Nelson fell."
"Oh, it is," replied the American. "Well, that ain't nothing. I nearly tripped on that darn thing myself."