I saw a police officer dressed as a pilot today and thought it was weird...

Then I realized he must be one of those “plane clothes cops”...

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the dirt, and cross the road again?

Because he was a dirty double-crosser!

Child: "Mom, may I have a bicycle for my birthday?"

Mom: "Will it make you behave any better if I do?"

Child: "No, but I’ll behave over a wider area."