While working in the psychology department at a local college, I was asked to enlarge a chart for a meeting. I called the copy room and asked, "Can I get something blown up down there?"

After a pause, the voice on the line replied, "I think you want the chemistry lab."

I was asking my friend at what point did Celsius and Fahrenheit become the same.

One of my other buddies quickly chimed in, "-40 degrees..."

Impressed I said, "I didn't know you were so knowledgeable in weather science?"

"I'm not," he said. "But I have been to Minnesota."

To prepare for my daughter's First Communion, I called the church in the town where we used to live to get a copy of her baptismal certificate.

We lived there for only a short while, so I didn't know the clergy well. When the secretary asked me the name of the father, I told her that I couldn't remember.

After a brief silence, she said, "Ma'am, I'm talking about the name of the baby's father."