business jokes

A man wrote a letter to the IRS:

“I have been unable to sleep knowing that I have cheated on my income tax. I understated my taxable income and have enclosed a check for $200.00. If I still can’t sleep, I will send the rest.”

After years of working for others and being passed over for promotions, John and his wife, Mary, decided to go into business together. After examining the classifieds, they bought a small candy stand, paying thirty cents for each box of candy and then selling it for thirty cents.

At the end of the day they were astonished to find that they had sold every box of candy – yet had exactly as much money as when they started.

“You see?” John snarled at his wife. “I told you we should have bought a larger stand!”

After a bitter marketing war, in which prices were continually being undercut, Birdseye and the Green Giant got together to settle their differences at a Peas Conference.

It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale and an advertisement in the local paper were the main reasons for the long line that formed in front of the store by 8:30, the store's opening time. A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back amid loud and colorful curses. On the man's second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw and knocked around a bit, then thrown to the end of the line again. As he got up the second time, he said to the person at the end of the line: "That does it! If they hit me one more time, I don't open the store!"