teacher jokes

Teacher: Today is the first day of the school, any questions?
John: Yes, when will the Holidays start?

Teacher: If you had 20p in one trouser pocket and 60p in the other, what do you have?
Pupil: Someone else’s trousers, miss.

A man walked up to a school and said "can you teach me to read and write"
The administrator said, "Yes we can"! Just fill out this form."

"Simon, if I had eight apples in my right hand and ten apples in my left hand, what would I have?”

“Huge hands, sir.”