A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he’d found a cat, but it was dead. “How do you know that the cat was dead?” the teacher asked.

“Because I pissed in its ear and it didn’t move,” answered the child innocently.

“You did WHAT?!?” the teacher exclaimed in surprise.

“You know,” explained the boy, “I leaned over and went ‘Pssst!’ and it didn’t move.”