"I came in to make an appointment with the dentist," said the man to the receptionist.
"I'm sorry sir," she replied. "He's out right now, but..."
"Thank you," interrupted the obviously nervous prospective patient. "When will he be out again?"
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta way. We cannoli do so much. His legacy will become a pizza history. Here today, gone tomato. How sad that he ran out of thyme.
Sending olive my prayers to the family. His wife is really upset; cheese still not over it. You never sausage a tragic thing. It's such a shame good people have to die fusilli reasons.
It was a farfalle from grace.
This is the story of four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody.
There was an important job to be done and Everybody was asked to do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it.
Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it.
Consequently, it wound up that Nobody told Anybody, so Everybody blamed Somebody.
A husband got his mother-in-law a cemetery plot for Christmas. It came with a coffin, tomb stone, the works.
Next Christmas comes by and the husband gets her nothing. The mother-in-law asks, "Why didn't you get me a gift?"
The husband says, "You haven't used the one I got you last year."