HENNE Profile

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HENNE

User Details

Member Since : Nov, 2015
# of jokes posted : 2301
# of followers : 33
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 3
Location: United States
won: $ 2505.00
3 votes

Last October my wife bought a magnolia tree from the local nursery, but after only a few weeks the leaves shriveled. It appeared to be on its last legs.

My wife took some leaf samples and marched into the nursery to demand an explanation.

"I know exactly what's wrong with your magnolia," said the manager.

"Good," said my wife. "What's it suffering from?"

"Autumn," he replied.

3 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
2 votes

My sister-in-law, a truck driver, had decided to get a dog for protection. As she inspected a likely candidate, the trainer told her, "He doesn't like men."

"Perfect," my sister-in-law thought and took the dog.

Then one day she was approached by two men in a parking lot, and she watched to see how her canine bodyguard would react. Soon it became clear the the trainer wasn't kidding. As the men got closer, the dog ran under the nearest car.

2 votes

CATEGORY Animal Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |
$8.00 won 6 votes

Torrential rainstorms were knocking down power lines all over town. That meant, as a customer service rep for the electric company, I was dispatching repairmen right and left.

When one lineman called a customer to get her exact address, he was told, "I'm at Post Office Box 99."

The weary lineman replied, "Ma'am, I'll be coming to you in a truck, not an envelope."

6 votes

CATEGORY Business Jokes
Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "HENNE" |
$5.00 won 7 votes
 

A man walks into his doctor's office and puts a note on the table for the doctor to read. It said, "I can't talk! Help me!"

The doctor nodded sagely and instructed the man to put his thumb on the table. The man thinks to himself that his thumb has nothing to do with his inability to talk, but he does as the doctor ordered.

The doctor quickly picked up a big book and whacks the man's thumb with it as hard as he could.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" the man yelled.

"Good, good," the doctor said. "Come back tomorrow and we'll work on the 'B'."

7 votes

CATEGORY Doctor Jokes
Joke Won 10th Place won $5.00
posted by "HENNE" |