HENNE Profile

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HENNE

User Details

Member Since : Nov, 2015
# of jokes posted : 1075
# of followers : 28
# of following: 0
eligible jokes to win : 9
Location: United States
won: $ 869.00
$7.00 won 5 votes

I can't remember how to write 51, 6, and 500 in Roman numerals.

I am LIVID!

5 votes

CATEGORY Misc Jokes
Joke Won 8th Place won $7.00
posted by "HENNE" |
2 votes

A man is struck by a bus on a busy street in New York City. He lies dying on the sidewalk as a crowd of spectators gathers around. "A priest! Somebody get me a priest!" the man gasps. A policeman checks the crowd but finds no priest, no minister, no man of God of any kind.

"A PRIEST, PLEASE!" the dying man says again. Then out of the crowd steps a little old Jewish man of at least eighty years of age. "Mr. Policeman," says the man, "I'm not a priest. I'm not even a Catholic. But for fifty years now I'm living behind St. Mary's Catholic Church on Third Avenue, and every night I'm listening to the Catholic litany. Maybe I can be of some comfort to this man."

The policeman agrees and brings the octogenarian over to the dying man. He kneels down, leans over the injured and says in a solemn voice, "B - 4. I - 19. N - 38. G - 54. O - 72."

2 votes

posted by "HENNE" |
$8.00 won 4 votes
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The custodian of a church quit. The pastor of the church asked the organist if she would be able also to clean the church sanctuary.

The organist thought before replying, ”Do you mean that I know have to mind my keys and pews?”

4 votes

Joke Won 7th Place won $8.00
posted by "HENNE" |
2 votes

After a trial had been going on for three days, Harrison, the man accused of committing the crimes, stood up and approached the judge's bench.

"Your Honor, I would like to change my plea from 'innocent' to 'guilty' of the charges."

The judge angrily banged his fist on the desk. "If you're guilty, why didn't you say so in the first place and save this court a lot of time and inconvenience?" he demanded.

Harrison looked up wide-eyed and stated, "Well, when the trial started I thought I was innocent, but that was before I heard all the evidence against me."

2 votes

CATEGORY Judge Jokes
posted by "HENNE" |